He’s “Online Dating” Another Girl. Carry out We Offer Him an Ultimatum?

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He’s “Online Dating” Another Girl. Carry out We Offer Him an Ultimatum?

Reader Question:

I met a guy online exactly who lives 500 kilometers out. He is 34 and that I’m 53. The guy performed let me know he previously a lady he dated “locally” and that he had been merely on the internet site searching for buddies. 90 days afterwards we noticed we have feelings each different.

At the same time, the guy nonetheless indicates he’s experiencing difficulity with his sweetheart, who isn’t some one he’s “dating” in your area. He is living with the lady in addition they’ve been with each other for four years.

At long last determined we had in order to satisfy to find out if it was well worth following. The guy gave me the reason why he didn’t imagine it was directly to take action as he was still with her. I finally offered him an ultimatum and told him i really couldn’t play 2nd fiddle. The guy professed their really love but said he had been very confused.

Carry out I offer him ultimatum, it is this lady or me? Was I wrong to inquire of him in order to make that choice?

-Nancy (Florida)

Dr Wendy Walsh’s Response:

Oh Nancy, Nancy, Nancy! You wrote in my opinion for honesty, correct? Well, will you be relaxing? Because right here arrives a honey container of reality.

You might be residing dream secure, my personal beloved lady. You’ve not even found this person which might not be a man and which may have a girlfriend.

I very suggest you find the documentary “Catfish” (available on iTunes and Netflix) about an internet love scam.

But even if you do not do that, let`s say for a moment he is really whom he states he or she is and disregard the reality he started writing for you by lying about their commitment status.

Let’s simply check out the alleged basic facts.

A.) He is nearly two decades more youthful than you.

B.) He is in a critical union.

C.) The guy told you from the beginning he is just looking to end up being pals.

And so I ask you, the reason why could you risk the cardiovascular system on this type of a bad choice?

Issue shouldn’t be about giving him an ultimatum, but rather, should you give yourself the really love you need?

If yes, next it is not the pony you really need to ride to the sunset with. Run, girl!

No counseling or psychotherapy advice: your website will not supply psychotherapy information. This site is intended only for usage by consumers in search of general info of great interest relating to dilemmas individuals may deal with as people and also in interactions and associated subjects. Content just isn’t intended to replace or serve as replacement pro assessment or solution. Contained observations and opinions shouldn’t be misconstrued as certain guidance advice.

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